“Tell me Edree. Does a senior manager in high tech really need to know how someone feels?”
What a great question and an obvious challenge. His tone was friendly, but with a definite “prove it” sort of feel to it. All eyes were on me. Especially because I am an “immigrant” to the technology world, I had to meet this challenge.
I smiled in secret gratitude for the perfect answer that had come to me just two days ago on the web.
“That’s a good question, _____.” The truth is I really don’t know.But what I do know is that MIT and other organizations are developing computers that can read and respond supportively to the emotions of the user, particularly the challenging emotions like frustration. I can say that it is clearly important for computers to know how people feel. Whether, it is important for managers in tech companies—-you’ll have to decide.”
Yes, the answer was a bit flippant, but it went over well. They laughed and seemed to pay closer attention.
But now I have the time to offer a more complete response. I will share it with you as well as with them.
Here are three reasons why it is not only necessary but crucial for senior managers as well as other leaders and employees in technology to develop greater Emotional Intelligence (which includes, but is much more that knowing how someone feels): 1. Neuro-scientists have determined that emotions heavily influence all our decisions and actions. 2. Emotions are a clue to what’s going on with the other person. 3. Challenging emotions, when ignored, can cause great chaos in the workplace.
What would you have said to the manager?
Behavioral science“technologists” have been using such concepts as encoding, decoding, transmitting and “noise” to explain human communication for several decades. This model may be familiar to you. It views communication as a linear act. It states that communication begins with an intention, encoded into a message by a sender, decoded by the receiver. What the receiver decodes produces a result–a reaction or response.
This model is useful in understanding how easy it is for humans to miscommunicate. Humans communicate primarily through words and non-verbal actions. The entire process is filled with filters of perception, interpretation and reactions based on memories. Not to mention individual and cultural differences in meanings surrounding the words—as well as entirely different language systems.
This linear model has it’s limitations. We will explore other models in future posts. However, it can very useful for technology engineers, developers, testers and managers to better understand how easy and common it is to misunderstand each other. It is also a useful tool for self-awareness and self-leadership.
Application Exercise:
Think of a recent communication (f2f or electronic) where you misunderstood someone or they didn’t “get” what you were attempting to convey. Think about what your intentions were—what you meant to encode into your communication. Now, remember what results you got. Here are three steps that may help you have a better result next time:
1. Imagine what filters (personality, culture, values belief systems, history) may have influence them to “hear” something different than you meant.
2. Even better, with a genuine curiosity, non- defensively asked them what they thought you meant by what you said/wrote. (Yes, some call this paraphrasing.)
You may be amazed how often we humans leave a conversation as if each person was in a different conversation. I’m interested in your thoughts and experience with the exercise.
Over time, while helping senior managers in the high tech industry develop interpersonal leadership skills, I realized that I have a lot in common with them. I am a “geek!” A “soft skills geek” I have had a life-long strong fascination with human behavior and possibilities. Like the tech professionals I work with, I have turned that fascination with the “technology and applications” of human behavior into a long-time professional career and business.
Baby Boomers, of which I am one, have had to move past resisting “all the fuss” about technology in order to thrive in the technology world. Luckily, the technology industry is beginning to realize that “all the fuss” about how to collaborate and work with people all over the world is fundamental to success in the world we have created, ironically through technology. High Tech needs High Touch.
I am intrigued by the amazing relationship between human beings and communications technology. In many ways, we have created information technology in our image. And increasingly, communications technology is influencing and mirroring back information to help us better understand ourselves as human beings. For example, parallel to the emergence of “cloud” storage of data, is the suggestion by neuro-scientists that perhaps our own individual and collective memories are stored in a cosmic “cloud” rather than our own brains. The exploration of this may help us understand things like “simultaneous” discoveries and previously unexplainable access to information.
Over the next few weeks, I invite you to “blog-travel” with me and guest colleagues, as we explore both similarities and differences between human and computer software and hardware. We are interested in your thoughts, your questions and your challenges. We will also focus on the practical implications for you at wok.
In the business world in general, and in technology industry in particular, many still hold onto the belief that decisions, at least their own, are made rationally. Based upon both social sciences and neuroscience evidence, as well as 30 years of professional experience, I would call that belief an illusion.
In fact, through technology, neuroscientists have been able to track emotional reactions of people in action. What they are discovering is that emotions are not an occasional effect of thought and behavior—instead, they essential drive most of our behavior—even in the “rational” workplace.
There have been recent breakthroughs in artificial intelligence fields that should spread light on the importance of soft skills for tech professionals and managers. In 2007, Jim LaMuth was granted his second patent on the formula for what some are calling the “emotions” chip for a computer. Ultimately, the chip is designed to help computers analyze both the direct and subtle aspects of language and respond– ethically.
Marvin Minsky, the author of The Emotion Machine has an interesting way of thinking about emotions that elevats the status of emotions in business so we can better understand and manage them. He suggests an alternative to thinking of emotions as a mysterious (and I add—wimpy and barely relevant) addition to thinking. He acknowledges that emotions have developed in animals and humans as states essential for survival. And, that since we tend to respect different ways of thinking, we should consider emotional states as a “different ways of thinking.”
What if that were true? What if our emotions really do help us process information and create new ideas? When I think of emotions as another way to process information, as well as another source of my creativity, my problems seem to become easier to handle. For example, I recently made a decision partially because I was pissed off. When I shared the decision with my colleague, she realized I had been angry and gave me an option to reconsider. When I reconsidered where I was coming from, I realized the bit of anger helped me to make a decision I had needed to make for several months. The emotion of slight to moderate anger helped me take the step.
I am curious. Can you think of a behavior or decision you made lately that was driven by an emotion? Anger? Fear? Joy? Hope? What part did that emotion play in your thinking process?
My Network Profiles